November 1, 2004
Dearest Gracie,
We have had a most exciting time of it here ever since August. You may have heard of it on the National Public Radio.
This is what happened: A large meteor fell from the sky!
The meteor landed in the desert about 150 kilometres from our village. Dust, ash, and fused bits of sand showered our huts and created interesting patterns on the hides of the pumpkins.
Fortunately no harm was done. This is even though the meteor is the size of an airship hangar.
Our stonemasons are cutting the meteor into blocks with which to build a church. The leftover bits we shall sell and use this money to buy new shoes and blankets for the winter.
I have enclosed a bit of this meteor! It may bring you good luck.
Best,
Muffin
November 3, 2004
Dearest Gracie,
Guess what we discovered within the meteor which fell from the sky in August. You shall never guess!
I urge you to guess!
Muffin
November 5, 2004
Dearest Gracie,
A 1986 Nissan Pickup Truck! That is what we found!
Best,
Muffin
November 7
Art Class
Ms. Van Lips, she is demonstrating how to connect two dots.
November 9
Playground
We are standing around in our coats. It is boring. Also damp.
Ice needles are falling from the sky.
Ms. Wysiwyg, she says we must spend time out of doors. We must do this every day. Even if we are frozen half dead. On account of it is damp.
Practice foot races. That is what Ms. Wysiwyg says. Play kick ball.
However, the kick ball, it is caved in and is frozen to the ground like a dead gourd.
November 11
Playground
Standing around slouched into our winter coats. Our paws or hoofs are stuffed into our winter coats pockets.
We are watching the little kids. They are singing JOLLY OLD SNOWMAN and they are constructing a snow fort which bristles with leafs and sticks.
The little kids, they do not seem to notice their mittens are soddened.
November 13
Playground
Hunched into our winter coats with half frozen ears. Except the owls.
Pia, she is attempting to light one of the slender brown cigarettes which Pia smokes nowadays. However, the gale force wind, it extinguishes the matches.
The little kids, they are gathered under the swing set. They are examining a dead vole.
November 14
Shop Class
Mr. Beernose, he is showing us a slide show of the Eiffel Tower and the Washington Monument also various Cathedrals.
Now that we know everything there is to know about the industrial arts, we are supposed to build something large.
I have not decided what to build.
November 20
Evening
THE FEMALE LAYS HER EGGS IN A SINGLE-STORY RANCH STYLE SAND CASTLE BUILT BY THE MALE...
On the sofa with Gross Disgusting Anatomy text book attempting to memorize all the parts of a horse gizzard.
Snooples is lying upon her stomach upon the carpet with her hind foots up in the air. Snooples gymnasium sneakers are bobbing and bobbing. Snooples chin is nestled upon her paws.
Snooples is watching a nature program concerning Clabberhead Turtles.
November 21
Early Evening
At dining room table with papers spread about.
Snooples and Chessie, they are outside in their snow suits and snow mittens and snow hats with large pom poms. They are propping up that life size plastic deer. They are using brooms and shovels and garden rakes and hoes.
Me, I do not have time to bother with that deer. I am busy drawing up plans for a cow barn.
November 23
This cow barn, it will be pretty good.
For example, it will have a place for cows to stand around in it.
November 25
Playground
Attempting to build a roaring fire in a trash can. Pia is dousing old milk cartons with lighter fluid.
Have lost feeling in toes.
Ben, he is setting with his bottom in the slush. Ben, he has his eyes pinched shut. Ben is holding a chicken egg in each paw. Ben is meditating and buzzing.
November 26
Playground
The little kids, they are patting together a tall and scrawny andlopsided snowman.
November 27, 2004
Muffin,
That life size plastic deer, it keeps toppling over into a discombobulated heap.
This is in spite of extensive repairs.
Pia says we should shoot it. In order to put it out of its misery. Chessie and Snooples say never.
November 29, 2004
Dear Gracie,
That pickup truck which we discovered inside the meteor which fell from the sky in August, the keys were still within the ignition receptacle. Furthermore, the petrol tank still contained a good amount of petrol!
Not many of us here know how to drive. However, some miniature horses in the next village are expert drivers. We contracted their assistance in the matter of the pickup truck from the sky.
Four of the miniature horses came buzzing over to our village in their small and sporty automobiles which they fabricated themselves from Jeep scraps.
They brought among them their best mechanic, who examined the pickup truck from end to end. The miniature horse mechanic pronounced the truck in good health engine-wise despite having traversed more then 200,000 miles upon the road and approximately 250,000,000 light-years once airborne.
Further forensic examination ascertained the following:
1. The truck became airborne sometime in the autumn of the year 2003.
2. It had recently had its oil changed before leaving the Planet Earth.
3. Despite significant rusting of the fenders and doors, the truck is still quite structurally sound.
4. It came from Pennsylvania.
Then one of the miniature horses climbed into the cab. He expertly commenced the operations of engaging the vehicle's ignition. Not seeing this sort of thing very often, we all stood around quite breathless.
The truck started upon the turn of the key! We cheered!
Until next time...
All My Best,
Muffin
November 30
Playground
We are standing around in our winter coats. We have our paws or hoofs in the pockets of our coats. We have the ear flaps on our hats pulled down over our ears.
The little kids, however, they do not seem to mind that it is cold as hell. The little kids, they are swinging on the swing sets and they are sliding down the sliding board, and they are spinning on that spinning thing.
Little kids, they are kind of intaresting.